Yesterday one of my friends said, “Don’t bleed before you’re cut.”
I like that. I used to spend a lot of time doing that. I’d project the feelings I would have in a certain situation and then I would wallow in them. Or, I would worry about all the things I can’t control, such as other people, places and things.
It’s true. We can’t control other people, places or things. Nada. Zilch. Not at all. Zero. But we spend much time complaining that our spouse left the cap off the toothpaste AGAIN, when we could just buy two tubes of toothpaste.
We worry that our kids won’t get good grades, but we don’t spend any time helping them with homework.
We drive ourselves nuts wondering if the boss will be in a good mood or if s/he will have another one of those “bad” days.
We have sleepless nights thinking about the money we don’t have or the money we do have or the bills that have to be paid.
We think, “If only he/she would change, I’d be happy.”
We ponder whether or not we’ll have enough money for retirement, whether the food we make for a party will have guests adoring it, or if we’ll die of cancer.
What? Me worry?
No more. I don’t worry about any of these things. I don’t project my feelings all over the place all the time and then blame it on someone else. Why?
Because I am only responsible for me. I can only control what I do or don’t do. I can’t predict the future, nor would I want to do so. It’s not up to me to tell someone else how to live their life if they haven’t asked for my advice (which is always good, by the way).
If someone says s/he will do something and doesn’t follow through, what can I do about it anyway? Nothing.
If something I plan doesn’t go the way I thought it would, I might be responsible for that or I might not. So, if I’m going to the grocery store and have a car accident because someone else was not looking and talking on his/her cell phone and hit me, can I change that? No. Period.
I don’t know when it happened, but I got tired of worrying, wondering, pondering and thinking about all the things, places and people and what might or might happen and what they might or might not do. It’s none of my business anyway. Really.
However, when I live in the moment, find joy in the small things, do the best I can each day no matter what my situation is, and help others I feel more whole. I feel closer to God. I feel that my life has a purpose, even if it’s only driving someone without a car somewhere that person needs to go.
I can’t change anyone else no matter how much I’d like to sometimes. I can only work on changing myself and being the best person I can be each day. I can be responsible for me.
So, what? You’re worrying? Try stopping and see how much better you feel. So, what? Someone drives you crazy because they do or say certain things all the time? Forget it. Just for a moment. One moment at a time, you can find peace. Really.
Oh, and by the way, it’s okay to bleed after you’re cut. But not for very long! Get on with it. Celebrate life! It’s the only way to live.